Questions

While I can't foresee every question I could possibly get answered, I can imagine a few of these being asked. These are not necessary to read to join the server, but if you want to ping me for a question, check this page to make sure it isn't answered here.

If you have questions you want to ask before joining the server, add me on Discord (.localvoid.), tell me you're from this site, and ask your question.

Some questions asked privately may be added to this page, in my own phrasing.

Q: What does "don't make me add another rule" mean?

A: The phrase "don't be the reason for a new rule" is common in the codes of conduct of Mastodon servers. It doesn't mean "if the server is inaccessible, you can't ask for rules requiring accommodations" or "if you asked a question that resulted in a new rule being added, that wasn't okay".

It means "don't cause problems that require me to add new rules to prevent behavior like yours".

It's in reference to people who do things that should normally be seen as common sense or adult maturity not to do. For example, the policy against political doomspiraling is influenced by people I've seen in servers who have done that kind of thing and caused problems because of it.

Q: Why do you discourage venting heavily yet still have vent channels?

A: Venting is something where, while I think it can cause problems if done in a certain way or to a certain extent, is still important for people to be able to do to some capacity. After having familiarized myself with what is and isn't considered reasonable in Discord servers, I think I can handle moderating some venting within what is reasonable, so long as there are disclaimers that excessive venting isn't to be encouraged.

Some environments that are very heavy on venting can become toxic due to people constantly airing their negative emotions and either never talking about positive ones, being very fragile in terms of their ability to express positive or neutral sentiments, and/or being next-to-impossible to help or calm down.

Furthermore, while it's important to have spaces where you can vent, it's also important to have spaces where you can socialize without venting, or without making venting a big part of your personality. Rat Piano is meant to be the latter kind of place.

I also believe venting can be subjective. For example, when people ask questions like "how is everyone doing?" in general chat, my answer is sometimes something like "A little stressed from medical appointments". This is far from a traumadump or a doomspiral, and it is an honest answer to the question, but it could be considered a vent to an extent.

If I wanted to talk in more detail about the stress of my medical appointment, I believe I should be allowed to and not have to completely censor myself about my daily experiences that are less than stellar. It might be inappropriate of me if I started panicking in the vent channel about my upcoming appointments, or relayed my medical trauma in graphic detail, especially without spoilering it, but since I don't have a problem moderating others' comparatively mild or censored vents, I believe my server is a suitable space for some venting.

While not every server is required to allow this, I have found it helpful when the vent channels of a server allow for discussion of very heavy topics, such as sexual trauma. However, some users may not want to see these discussions. Therefore, there is a separate channel for heavier venting, as well as venting where the topic is NSFW in some way.

To me, the purpose of vent channels in a Discord server is to relegate heavier or less positive discussion to one place, so people who don't want to see it don't have to opt in to those channels. The purpose of vent channels is not to use them excessively or to foster an environment of negativity.

Q: What is this server's policy on non-sharing self-shippers or fictionkin who don't want to be around doubles?

A: I personally don't want to have to moderate problems that are caused by people who can't put a certain layer of distance between themselves and fiction, or who are so jealous of their partners, even their fictional ones, that the very concept that they could be with someone else causes them to dissociate, or who feel the same way about certain aspects of their identity.

The server isn't uniquely geared towards self-ship or otherkin, but there are a few channels to talk about it, and people are encouraged to talk about their self-ships and alterhumanity in the personal channels. Therefore, if you are a non-sharing self-shipper who cannot handle any possibility of sharing a space with people who self-ship with the same characters as them, this is maybe not the server for you.

The same goes for fictionkin who cannot handle the possibility of doubles in the same server. While I understand that you can feel very, very strongly connected to your source as a fictionkin, you need to be able to think of doubles as AU versions of your source and be able to handle how it makes you feel if someone is a "different" version of you.

If you feel excluded by this policy, there are plenty of other servers on Discord that can be found on Disboard that will make the accommodations for you that you desire. This server, however, is not the place for you.

Q: Aren't your policies about accountability discriminatory towards people with BPD/DID/etc.?

A: Some systems or people with mental illness treat "system accountability" or "take responsibility for your mental health" as meaning "don't have amnesia or mental illness". This is not how I see it. I see it as meaning "learn to manage your amnesia or mental illness".

You are a person in this world who is either an adult or learning to be an adult, and if you're not an adult yet, you shouldn't be considering joining this server. Adults have to manage their lives, even if it's extremely difficult or even unfair (which "difficult" is not always the same as). This includes managing things caused by disability and trauma.

The results of disability and trauma are not your fault, but they are your responsibility, and I moderate my server by this principle. If you consider that harsh, then consider that life is harsh and adulthood is harsh, but yet we are adults who must rise to the occasion of this life, no matter the circumstances, and we are all the only ones responsible for ourselves in the end.

Q: What is shipcourse and "anti-anti", and why do you have problems with the whole thing?

A: Shipcourse is, in the simplest terms, a type of fandom discourse that originally was about whether or not it was acceptable to ship certain ships if they contained elements such as abuse or incest. People labeled themselves "anti-shippers" or "antis" if they opposed those ships.

It quickly turned into a politically-charged debate in which ships and shipping were seen as extensions for the entirety of fiction or even of free speech, and "proship" - the side in favor of the ships to which exception was taken - became the side of anti-censorship and anti-harassment views.

Anti-shippers are usually in favor of harassment, hostile to others and each other, given to self-policing, not okay with extreme horror themes or extreme kinks that my system enjoys, and generally unpleasant people, so I would be considered "anti-anti", which is synonymous with "proship".

However, many people who use the proship label have problems, such as not engaging with fiction outside of fandom media, actively eschewing critical thinking, and thinking literally everything in fiction is okay, including actual Nazi propaganda.

Furthermore, people on both sides have a bad habit of viewing "proship vs anti" as a binary that literally everyone fits into, with some going so far as to say "one of the only binaries that is actually true", with no hint of self-awareness. I do not align myself with this kind of thinking at all, and I therefore dislike using shipcourse labels to signal the stances by which I moderate my server.

If you identify as a proshipper, you are more than welcome to join the server, but if you're the kind of person who slots EVERYONE into proship or anti, you may clash a bit with the management's way of thinking.

While I don't personally have a problem with whatever types of fiction you consume, I restrict discussions on certain types of concent due to legal concerns, namely concerning underage characters. A lot of other types of dark fictional content, however, can be discussed in the server.

Q: What is transID and why do you have problems with it?

A: The most neutral way I can describe transID is that it's an identity community based around labels for people who want to transition to something other than gender.

While some of it is fine (e.g. "transaesthetic" people who want to present with a certain aesthetic but can't), some of it is more questionable (e.g. "transrace", including people who want to physically transition from white to Black) to downright dangerous (e.g. "transabuser", people who genuinely want to abuse others and some of whom plan to "transition" to this identity in real life).

Q: What is desirdae and why are you okay with it?

A: Desirdae is an alternative identity label that is meant to describe people who desire or want to be something that they physically are not.

However, the term, in addition to not co-opting the "trans" prefix from the transgender community, is explicitly against transitioning in ways that would be considered harmful, and the community seems to consider it that, while identities that might be considered harmful (e.g. "desirabused", wishing you had been abused) are worth examining if you are truly experiencing them, they should be discussed with a degree of care and should not be seen as the same as things you can happily transition to with no problem, which is different than large swaths of the transID community.

Q: What is radqueer and why do you want nothing to do with it?

A: Radqueer is a term that has a lot of misinformation surrounding it and where aspects of the community has changed over time. However, it is a discourse-related term (which I already have issues with), and people who are radqueer believe that transIDs and paraphilias are queer and should be respected as queer identities by wider society, which I take issue with, even if I support anti-contact paraphiles.

Furthermore, the radqueer community is commonly associated with pro-contact stances for consent-related ("harmful") paraphilias - that is, believing it is okay for zoophiles to have sex with animals, or that it is okay for pedophiles to look at CSEM. While this is not an inherent part of radqueer ideology, it is/was believed by the founder of radqueer and by many early and current members of the community, and many radqueer beliefs (e.g. that pedophilia is a legitimate sexual orientation) naturally lend themselves to pro-contact beliefs, which is part of why I don't support it.

While I understand that some radqueers label themselves as anti-contact - that is, they do not support paraphiles acting on their attraction if it would hurt somebody in any way - I still disagree with them considering paraphilias and especially transIDs to be queer.

I would seriously not recommend radqueers join this server, and if I ever have to remove anybody from this server, I see radqueer-related conflicts as being a potential reason why.